A late love

You close your eyes and you see him. You remember clearly how it feels to have his arms around you, making time stop and fly by at the same time. There was never enough time together to not make you miss him. You can hear him laugh at your funny comment while he calls you stupid, in the good way. He makes you chuckle every time he claims he’s perfect. “Obviously”. And every single time he calls you beautiful your face turns red from blushing as your heart skips a beat or two whenever he holds your hand.

He promised he would never make you cry, yet he is the reason you haven’t stopped feeling sad. He says he’s always going to be there for you, but you are the one that lays alone in bed every night. His warmth is gone, but you can still feel him holding you. He whispers he loves you and kisses you. You can’t deny you love him too, and miss him almost as much as you love him.

How do you know it was real? You are certain it all happened the way you remember. Memories can be altered and feelings can be fabricated, but you cannot fake your love for him. A late love, the crazy kind that makes sense and none at all altogether. The one you where you just want to see him to talk to about your day and how everything went, or to just sit together in silent company. It could have been the one you grow old with.

You open your eyes, and you mourn once more as you have before. It is not a big deal- you tell yourself- you knew this is how it was going to end. But why does it feel like your heart is gone. You really want to use the word broken but that is such a cliché. Undeniably, there is a hole in your chest, cliché or not, and all you keep asking yourself is the same question all over again. Was it real? You wish it wasn’t, but you already know the answer. No matter how many times you think about it, this heartache is too painful and that is as real as it can get.

∼ ¤Sunny¤

Rain

Watching the rain fall on a dark night, knowing I’ll never see your beautiful face again.  “It won’t be the same, but it’ll be okay. Oh, it’ll be okay”, I keep saying that to myself.

But that’s just it, I don’t want to accept it.
I don’t like this change, I don’t like it at all.

I just want to keep seeing your face every day and every night. And, if the rain falls, have you by my side for the rest of my life.

“Please, don’t leave”, I begged you to stay. “Don’t leave”.
But you did.
And it’s been raining ever since.


Time has passed. And as I watch and feel the rain fall again, every night seems lighter and I accept I’ll never see your face again. It won’t be the same, but it’ll be okay.
It has to be okay.

Because, even though you left, the rain didn’t.
And rain makes everything better.

¤ Sunny ¤

To the one I’ll never forget

I can feel the Sun. Butterflies flying inside of me. White clouds filling the bright blue sky above me.

The flavor of your lips is unique and unforgettable, making me want to stay in silent if it means tasting them forever.

The sound of your voice whispered into my ears makes me tremble, not of fear but of excitement by having you so close to me.

Your arms wrapped around me keeps me together like a whole entity, which will fall apart if you weren’t here.

Your eyes see right through me and into me. I am no longer invisible nor ignored.

Your smile brightens my darkness and I don’t live in fear anymore.

Your touch makes me realize I am alive. And for all of that and much more:

I love you.

You will always have a part of my heart that no one else will.

And if you ever have to leave and I never hear from you again, know that you made me feel young, beautiful and proud of being who I am, the real me.

The one I finally met, when I met you.

¤ Sunny ¤

PS: Never apologize for being who you are.