Some type of Love life

You currently do not have a love life, unless you count being in love with an idiot who doesn’t realize how much you love him and all he means to you a love life…

Every time you see a friends relationship go down the drains is like your heart breaks a little and you feel a little bit of pain. They tend to move on to the next person rather quickly and you can’t understand how they do it. How do they move on so fast onto the next person when used to say they loved the person they were with before? And that might work for them but not for you.

For you, loving someone doesn’t come or goes away lightly. If anyone ever really felt love as you do: a deep connection to someone you can be yourself and see a future with, someone you look forward to share all your life with. Someone you can’t take out of your mind even if you’re mad at them, and that you wish and pray is having a good day even if you’re having a really bad one. Someone you’re willing to go to the end of the Earth to make them happy and help them achieve their biggest dream and success. That kind of love, which is the only one you’ve felt, it is not easily broken or easy to part with.

You may barely have a love life and he may never come to realize it, but your love is real. Your love is wanting him to be happy, as happy as he can be, even if it means not ending up with you.

¤SUNNY¤

No way out

There’s no way out of this misery.

When you feel like your heart’s been ripped out and you were left to die out in the darkest alley of the world.

There will be no lights to guide you this time. You’ve reached your end and there’s no way out.

¤SUNNY¤

A peak into the heart

“I feel lonely.”
There! I finally said it!
Like there’s something wrong with saying those words…

Fear.
But fear of what?
Vulnerability? Weakness? Exposure?

No.
What I’m afraid of is feelings;
acknowledging their presence.

Realizing I have them.
*Shudders*
Realizing I have them for you…

Ugh!
This is why I never, ever use those words!
Because they open the door for more.

For more words, like “I miss you”,
“I want to see you”.
And finally “I love you”.

And all that will only end with the words I fear the most,
“It’s over”.
Or worse…
“I love you too”.

¤ Sunny ¤