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Some type of Love life

You currently do not have a love life, unless you count being in love with an idiot who doesn’t realize how much you love him and all he means to you a love life…

Every time you see a friends relationship go down the drains is like your heart breaks a little and you feel a little bit of pain. They tend to move on to the next person rather quickly and you can’t understand how they do it. How do they move on so fast onto the next person when used to say they loved the person they were with before? And that might work for them but not for you.

For you, loving someone doesn’t come or goes away lightly. If anyone ever really felt love as you do: a deep connection to someone you can be yourself and see a future with, someone you look forward to share all your life with. Someone you can’t take out of your mind even if you’re mad at them, and that you wish and pray is having a good day even if you’re having a really bad one. Someone you’re willing to go to the end of the Earth to make them happy and help them achieve their biggest dream and success. That kind of love, which is the only one you’ve felt, it is not easily broken or easy to part with.

You may barely have a love life and he may never come to realize it, but your love is real. Your love is wanting him to be happy, as happy as he can be, even if it means not ending up with you.

¤SUNNY¤

“Cause I thought it would eventually start to fade but I still miss you like I did the first day” – ¤SUNNY¤

(Aug 27, 2019)

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No way out

There’s no way out of this misery.

When you feel like your heart’s been ripped out and you were left to die out in the darkest alley of the world.

There will be no lights to guide you this time. You’ve reached your end and there’s no way out.

¤SUNNY¤

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New you: Lost Game (Day 6 of 6)

You thought you were a new you, but you keep doing it; it turns out you’re the same old one.

Losing and parting ways before absence takes place, while they are still here.

There’s that deafening silence that pierces through and reaches your soul.

But you swallow your heart and shut your senses to what feels real.

Turns out you lost.

¤SUNNY¤

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Invisible (Day 5 of 6)

When you were a little girl, you imagined invisibility was your greatest superpower. You’d hide around the house, sneaking up on your mom while she pretended she couldn’t see you. You’d believe it and felt like the most powerful being on the world. You always thought how amazing it would be to just be invisible to other people and walk amongst them without being noticed. It was all fun and games.

But you grew up and now it’s not so fun anymore. Because of all the people that you would want to be invisible to, he is not one of them. Yet he acts like you’re no longer there. No words are directed at you and he doesn’t look at you anymore. It’s like all of a sudden you’d ceased to exist and he can’t (doesn’t want to) see you ever again.

When you were little you’d never thought being invisible would cause you pain and hurt and so, oh so much sadness.

When you were a little girl, you imagined invisibility was your greatest superpower until you got tired and stopped pretending. But this time you cannot stop pretending, because he’s the one that gave you that “superpower”. And though you no longer want to be invisible to him, it’s not up to you anymore. And it doesn’t seem you’ll stop being invisible any time soon and that really hurts.

¤SUNNY¤

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You’ll survive

-“How do you survive a broken heart?”, she asked.

-“You pick yourself up and look forward.

And eventually you’ll realize it.”, he said.

-“Realize what?”, she questioned, this time fighting the tears in her eyes.

-“You’ll either realize that you never really loved them or that you lost an unforgettable kind of love. The kind that, even after healing and finding someone new to love, still leaves a small void that would never be filled by anyone else, only them.

How do you survive a broken heart? You keep on living and with time your hurt will be replaced by numbness, and that numbness will either disappear or never go away. You’ll survive, but you will never be the same”, he finalized as she started to walk away.

¤SUNNY¤

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New you: “I am a mess” (Day 4 of 6)

You used to be strong and relentless.

You used to not show any pain.

What happened to you?

When did you change so much?

Why is your soul so broken?

It’s like your heart and brain are out of tune.

“I am a mess”, you say to the mirror in front of you.

And you are right. You are damaged goods.

But you are not the only one.

You just need time. And you need peace.

All you really need is time to heal.

¤SUNNY¤

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New you: It’s okay (Day 2 of 6)

It’s okay…

It’s okay to like someone and not being liked back. It’s okay to love fully without a shadow of a doubt even if you’re not reciprocated. It’s okay that life and love is about taking chances and leaps of faith. It’s okay to just enjoy that feeling while it lasts.

Because after all, you can still always smile. You can dance even if there’s no music playing. You can breathe and take in all the air you need. And, best of all, you can write freely.

It’s okay and we both know there is no better feeling in the world than pouring your heart and mind into a thousands words. It doesn’t have to be fancy, it doesn’t have to be pretty or right, it just has to be you.

It’s okay to be that silly, clumsy, honest, happy, full of life and hopelessly romantic you.

Being you it’s always okay.

¤Sunny¤

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Listen

Have you heard the song of the lonely
silently screaming at night
It’s a song that keeps leaving
a long trail of footsteps behind.
A song, if you listen,
calling for help from afar.
Will you listen? Will you listen?
To the song of the lonely tonight.

It’s a heart that keeps bleeding
A soul that’s been broken
A love that’s been lost
And an unfulfilled dream.
It’s the song of the lonely
We all have sung it before.
So, why won’t you listen
to the song of the lonely once more.

The same pain has been shared
and we are not even aware
If a little more attention is paid,
you might be able to help.
For all a lonely soul needs
is for someone willing to hear
So, will you listen? Will you listen?
To the song of the lonely tonight.

¤Sunny¤